Looking for funny ways to say none of your business? This list of 200+ creative phrases will help you express boundaries and keep conversations light yet clear.
Whether you’re joking with friends, responding in texts, or just making a point, these alternative expressions make saying “none of your business” more interesting and memorable.
From clever phrases to witty retorts, there’s a way to set boundaries for every personality and situation!
The Benefits of Using Funny Ways to Say None of Your Business

- Adds Clarity: Creative ways to say none of your business help you communicate boundaries clearly.
- Lightens Conversations: Unique phrases reduce tension while maintaining firmness.
- Sparks Engagement: Fun expressions can make interactions more playful without giving details.
- Memorable Communication: Expressing boundaries in different ways keeps your messages engaging and clear.
Funny Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s classified info.”
- “Top secret, can’t tell.”
- “I could tell you, but then I’d have to lie.”
- “Information unavailable for public release.”
- “That’s VIP only knowledge.”
- “I’m sworn to secrecy.”
- “Restricted area, no entry.”
- “Access denied on that topic.”
- “That’s confidential.”
- “Not in the sharing zone.”
- “I’m keeping that under wraps.”
- “That’s off-limits for discussion.”
- “Sorry, that’s private.”
- “I can’t disclose that right now.”
- “That’s not open for comment.”
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Cute Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s a little secret of mine.”
- “Can’t tell, it’s a mystery.”
- “Shh, top secret!”
- “That’s my little secret.”
- “Eyes only on this one.”
- “I’m keeping that tucked away.”
- “Sorry, that’s for my ears only.”
- “Can’t share, it’s private.”
- “That’s a tiny secret I’m holding.”
- “I’m saving that story for later.”
- “That’s a hush-hush topic.”
- “I’m keeping that to myself.”
- “That’s just between me and me.”
- “Sorry, that’s a secret treasure.”
- “I’m guarding that info carefully.”
Cool Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s not your lane.”
- “Mind your own universe.”
- “That info is off limits.”
- “Not something you need to know.”
- “Keep your eyes on your own game.”
- “That’s above your clearance level.”
- “I’m handling that myself.”
- “That’s private property.”
- “You don’t need the details.”
- “That’s locked in my vault.”
- “Focus on your side of things.”
- “That’s in my zone only.”
- “I’ve got it covered.”
- “That’s not open for inspection.”
- “I’m keeping that on the low.”
Best Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s private information.”
- “I’m not sharing that.”
- “That’s personal, sorry.”
- “I’m keeping that to myself.”
- “That’s none of your concern.”
- “I prefer to keep that private.”
- “Not something I can discuss.”
- “That’s confidential.”
- “I’m choosing not to answer.”
- “That’s my business, not yours.”
- “I’m keeping that under wraps.”
- “That’s restricted information.”
- “I’m not disclosing that.”
- “That’s off limits.”
- “I’m handling that on my own.”
Good Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “I’d rather not get into that.”
- “That’s private for now.”
- “I prefer to keep that to myself.”
- “Not something I can share.”
- “I’m keeping that personal.”
- “I’d like to handle that privately.”
- “That’s confidential information.”
- “I’m not comfortable sharing that.”
- “That’s for my eyes only.”
- “I’m keeping that off-limits.”
- “That’s a private matter.”
- “I’d like to keep that between us.”
- “I’m not discussing that right now.”
- “That’s restricted for now.”
- “I prefer to handle that myself.”
Catchy Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s behind my curtain.”
- “I’m keeping that in my pocket.”
- “Out of bounds for you.”
- “That’s locked in my diary.”
- “Hands off that info.”
- “That’s in the vault.”
- “No entry on that topic.”
- “Keep your curiosity elsewhere.”
- “That’s under my radar only.”
- “I’m keeping that off the record.”
- “That’s not up for grabs.”
- “I’ve got that covered solo.”
- “Private lane, do not enter.”
- “That’s tucked safely away.”
- “I’m keeping that in my corner.”
Unique Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s on my private list.”
- “I’m keeping that off the grid.”
- “That’s my secret territory.”
- “Not open for discussion.”
- “I’m guarding that information.”
- “That’s my exclusive knowledge.”
- “I’m not letting that out.”
- “That’s for my eyes only.”
- “I’ve got that behind closed doors.”
- “Not something to be shared.”
- “That stays in my domain.”
- “I’m keeping that under lock and key.”
- “That’s a personal zone.”
- “I’m not revealing that.”
- “That’s restricted to me.”
Sarcastic Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “Oh sure, let me spill all my secrets.”
- “Right, because you need to know everything.”
- “Absolutely, I’ll tell the world for you.”
- “Of course, let me just ignore privacy.”
- “Why not? Everyone should know that.”
- “Oh yeah, it’s definitely your concern.”
- “Sure, let me make it your problem too.”
- “Naturally, you get a front-row seat.”
- “Of course, let me hand over my secrets.”
- “Right, because you asked so nicely.”
- “Oh yeah, that’s totally your business.”
- “Absolutely, why not invade my privacy?”
- “Sure, let me update you on that.”
- “Yes, because that’s what you signed up for.”
- “Of course, let me include you in everything.”
Nice Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “I’d prefer to keep that private.”
- “That’s something I’m handling personally.”
- “I hope you don’t mind if I keep that to myself.”
- “I’m keeping that just for me.”
- “I’d rather not share that information.”
- “That’s a private matter for now.”
- “I’m keeping that under wraps.”
- “Thanks for understanding, that’s personal.”
- “I’m not discussing that at the moment.”
- “I’d like to manage that privately.”
- “That’s something I’m keeping to myself.”
- “I’m taking care of that on my own.”
- “I hope you understand, that’s private.”
- “That’s for my eyes only right now.”
- “I’m keeping that information to myself.”
Polite Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “I’d rather not discuss that.”
- “I hope you don’t mind, that’s private.”
- “That’s a personal matter.”
- “I’m keeping that confidential for now.”
- “I prefer to keep that to myself.”
- “I’d like to manage that privately.”
- “That’s not something I can share.”
- “I’m not able to talk about that.”
- “That’s a matter I’m handling personally.”
- “I hope you understand, it’s private.”
- “I’m keeping that information to myself.”
- “I’d rather handle that privately.”
- “That’s a sensitive topic for me.”
- “I’m not discussing that at this time.”
- “I’d like to keep that between us.”
Rude Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “Mind your own business.”
- “That’s none of your concern.”
- “Stay out of it.”
- “Not your problem.”
- “Why do you care?”
- “Keep your nose out of it.”
- “That’s not your issue.”
- “Don’t ask me that.”
- “None of your concern, thanks.”
- “Back off, it’s private.”
- “That’s not for you to know.”
- “Stay in your lane.”
- “Don’t poke your nose in my affairs.”
- “That’s off-limits to you.”
- “Mind your own affairs.”
Savage Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s my life, not your soap opera.”
- “Not your circus, not your monkeys.”
- “Keep scrolling, that’s private.”
- “I run my show, you stay tuned out.”
- “That’s my drama, not yours.”
- “Hands off, it’s none of your business.”
- “I’m not auditioning for your curiosity.”
- “You don’t get a backstage pass.”
- “That’s locked, no key for you.”
- “I handle that, you handle your own.”
- “That’s my lane, stay in yours.”
- “Zero access granted.”
- “Not your soap, not your episode.”
- “Keep your questions to yourself.”
- “I’m the boss of my secrets.”
Other Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s private information.”
- “I’m not sharing that.”
- “That’s for me to know.”
- “Not something I can discuss.”
- “I’m keeping that to myself.”
- “That’s none of your concern.”
- “I prefer to keep that private.”
- “That’s confidential.”
- “I’m handling that personally.”
- “That’s off limits.”
- “I’m keeping that under wraps.”
- “Not open for discussion.”
- “I’m not disclosing that.”
- “That’s restricted information.”
- “I’m keeping that in my control.”
Different Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s personal, not public.”
- “I’m keeping that private.”
- “Not something I can share right now.”
- “That’s between me and myself.”
- “I’m keeping that to myself.”
- “That’s not open for discussion.”
- “I prefer to handle that privately.”
- “That’s confidential for now.”
- “I’m not sharing that information.”
- “That’s off-limits.”
- “I’m keeping that in my hands.”
- “That’s restricted for outsiders.”
- “I’m not discussing that topic.”
- “That stays private.”
- “I’m the only one handling that.”
Weird Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s behind the velvet curtain.”
- “I’m keeping that in the secret cupboard.”
- “Not for your eyeballs.”
- “That info lives in a bubble.”
- “I’m not letting that float out.”
- “That’s in the hidden vault.”
- “Keep your antennas down.”
- “That’s swirling in my private cloud.”
- “I’m locking that in a box.”
- “That’s tucked in the mystery zone.”
- “Not on the menu for you.”
- “That’s orbiting my own galaxy.”
- “I’m keeping that behind the magic door.”
- “That info is hibernating.”
- “That’s dancing in my own little world.”
Dirty and Naughty Ways to Say None of Your Business
- “That’s my secret, hands off.”
- “You don’t get a peek at that.”
- “Keep your nose out of my bedroom.”
- “That’s mine, not for sharing.”
- “I’m not letting that slip to you.”
- “Stay out of my private matters.”
- “That’s off-limits, naughty or nice.”
- “You don’t get clearance here.”
- “That’s tucked away, don’t touch.”
- “My secrets, my rules.”
- “Keep your curiosity in check.”
- “That’s behind my locked door.”
- “Hands off my private business.”
- “That’s mine, not for your eyes.”
- “Don’t poke around in my affairs.”





